Sometimes when I read a book that manages to cut me open, it’s hard to review because I have to sift through all of my own, possibly irrelevant, emotions in order to say something that I think might be viewed as universal. After all one of the aims of this blog is to help gain attention to the books I am reading, but the overall purpose is to document my journey in reading them. I am honest, and I try to share bits of myself in these reviews because a journey is a personal thing, or at least this one, reading, always has been for me. I am going to push myself here, with this review, because the way it cut me open- I don’t think I’ll be able to close so easily this time.
Alone is about a woman, Celeste Thorne, who takes part in a psychology study which requires her to be in complete isolation for a minimum of 3 years and a maximum of 4 with a paycheck that reaches $500k if she stays the full time. Celeste is almost half a year away from making it to the full 4 years when an injured hiker shows up on her compound. Spending so much time alone has its side effects, and Celeste has already been hearing voices and feeling phantom touches. The hiker, Olivia Soldano, seems real, but also too good to be true. As Celeste struggles with what to do with her trespasser- whether she should tell the controllers that she is no longer alone- the relationship between her and Olivia intensifies. The two women share a lot in common and the relief of having companionship for Celeste is overwhelming. Unfortunately, the situation isn’t exactly what it seems and Celeste is left deciphering if her feelings were real or just a byproduct of the experiment.
This book is intense. I love intense books. Not only is the writing so beautiful and powerful, but Noyes really deep dives into the psychological effect of being alone for so long. After surviving a traumatic childhood, Celeste’s decision in taking this job wasn’t difficult- no one is left to miss her and the only thing she’s leaving behind is pain. Noyes holds up a magnifying glass to that pain as Celeste’s abundance of spare time and isolation causes that pain to fester. I felt so many things for Celeste this entire novel. We really understand her and the choices she makes.
I immediately re-listened to this novel after I finished, not because I didn’t see the spoiler coming (I knew it prior to starting the book), but because I needed to understand why this story made me feel the way it did- anxious, emotionally heavy, like I had been caught patting my heart on its head whispering “there, there.” Alone has a strong underlining theme that centers on the passing of time and whether one is using that time in a way that equates to truly living their life. I found the passages that focused on this were fascinating, beautiful, and extremely relatable. Personally, the last few years have slipped so quickly by that I can no longer distinguish distinct events or holidays from the ones that occurred prior or after. Everything is blurring together, I’m getting older, and it terrifies me. In Alone Celeste finds what she has designated “slow time” with Olivia. While in the compound time passes by so quickly that months go by without notice. However, when Olivia enters the days slow down and Celeste is able to find herself enjoying the moment. After she leaves the compound she’s able to find these moments again, like while playing with little kittens, but they are sparse and hard to come by. It is only when she is with Olivia that she feels as though she is consistently in slow time, living a meaningful life.
I see where this book can be considered a romance, but besides the epilogue, this read more as literary/general fiction to me. Though there is a strong love story throughout, the focus is on Celeste’s internal struggle. We do learn a lot about Olivia, and I thought the character details given were telling and provided enough understanding that made me really feel for her. This is the kind of book I would recommend to anyone who enjoys the deep, beautiful stuff that stays with you awhile after. https://www.amazon.com/Alone
Follow E. J. Noyes on Twitter: @zgrokit